Every heterosexual woman alive that is old enough to know about the cabbage patch dolls, has either met or dated this man!
He is the “right” height, he has the “right” level of education; (he knows the difference between I am & am; your & you’re & their, there & they’re, our & are) , he “understands your perspective and agrees with you that your ex, was a complete waste of human mass and he is willing to “wait” until you’re ready to take the relationship to a physical position. (Pun intended) he’s definitely “the one” right? Stop! No seriously stop!
If you find yourself saying this after just one conversation with a man, please put on the brakes, do not proceed to go, go directly to your safety zone, better yet, go directly to jail, you’ll be safer there! This man is the biggest manipulator ever to be birthed, I’ve asked God countless times why he creates these mean kind of people? These men are thieves, they rob you of time, mental focus, and for some of us they cause deep rooted malignant contention by insulting our intelligence!
Everything apparent and obvious about them is “perfect”, leaving you to believe that he is just too good to be true, believe me, he isn’t, but that’s the bait! Once you’ve adorned the hat of skepticism that he can’t be this image of perfect you concluded he is , you’re inclined to dig up the dirt, you need to get into his head and dirty laundry. Bait received. Now you’re spending time with the Sharman. He’s feeding you bits and pieces of a not entirely clandestine past, but one that’s not entirely as ivory as you first thought him to be either! Great, he’s a little normal and, here we go, “potentially datable”! RIP to time that you are about to waste over the next four to eight weeks getting to know this con artist of time wasting.
These men are not interested in a long term committed relationship, in fact, the word “relationship” is a word used to describe the dynamics between them and their selfish desires and intentions, notice the M.O. here, everything is about them. Their sole intent is to make you feel as though you are understood, you are appreciated and that they are nothing like the person you told them was the last scumbag on earth! So they sit with you on a pre-planned date night to “talk” and get to know you! Ok let’s think about this for awhile… Men don’t like to “talk” and if they do oblige you with a “talk”, it better have an opening sentence, a middle and a conclusion! They don’t have the emotional capacity to listen to all the explanatory and detailed presentation of whatever it is you want to talk about, but “Mr. Potential” does! he listens to what you have to say and he totally gets you! Excuse me whiles I roll my eyes! This man is playing you like like Stevie wonder makes love to those piano keys, but you don’t see that though! You don’t see it because you don’t want to.
In the first month, because you’re still 15 percent away from trusting him enough to want to get physical with him, he texts you through the day, might give you a call on a lunch break or send you that “good morning” text that makes you believe you were the first thing on his mind when he opened his eyes, that right there is a guarantee to have him on your mind all day and he knows it! After dates, he’s undertandsbly going home. He doesn’t pressure you at all for sex, might not even ask you or talk about it unless you bring it up! He’s got you like,” he’s so respectful” he is definitely potential boyfriend material. (The tactic here is to get you to relax with him and not feel as though you have to protect the goodies from him, because he’s only interested in sex, if you are. You’ll also do good to know that he has a sex bunny he’s got on speed dial, to keep him satisfied until he gets your goodies)
So you’re on a home date,(your house, you’ve probably visited his home twice, he feels more “comfortable” with you at your place. This being because his place is an official bachelor pad, only meant for getting it in and putting you out) maybe sitting on the couch watching a syndicated re-run of The Jamie Fox show, not really watching because your mind’s still trying to grasp the fact that this seemingly genuine guy is single and not “cuffed” so you bring up that conversation (the one about him being boyfriend material) and he reaches over and kisses you on your forehead and says to you let’s see where this goes and that’s he’s definitely open to that. You’re hearts a flutter, really, a flutter? no one even says a flutter, but that’s where you’re at, all tingly inside and getting really moist down there! You’re ready, ok he deserves to get the goodies! (Please note that he said “let’s see where this goes”, this as in what y’all are doing right then, before he even considered the idea of being in a relationship with anyone other than his selfishness)
He knows he’s got you, you just lost the initiative of having control over not getting your feelings hurt. He calls you up on Friday night, (yesterday was the talk) asking whether or not you have plans, because his best friend is having a get together and he wanted you to accompany him! Your heart is racing, you’re wearing that big Mr Kool-aid grin on your face and all of a sudden your voice goes to the annoyingly high pitch of Niki minaj’s Barbie voice! Of course you’re going to go, he wants you to meet his friends, things just got real between you, officially in your head this makes ya’ll “official”! STOP rewind! To yesterday after he left your house.
Mr Potential: Yo, my nigga she just hit me with the boyfriend conversation, is this chick crazy? It’s only been a month, plus I ain’t even hit it yet!
Friend: What! my nigga you ain’t hit yet?
Mr. Potential: Nah man, I’m playing it cool, you got to know the kind of woman you’re dealing with and this one is real smart!
Friend: I feel you bro, so what are you going to tell her?
Mr. Potential: I ain’t telling her nothing, I’m going to bring her through to the party, make her feel I’m feeling that boyfriend thing, you know how chicks think man, they think if they meet the fam and friends they’re in! Mingle with you niggas for a few, then take her back to the crib, gotta make it look good, hit it n split!
Friend: (laughs) word, do your thing bro I’ll holla at you then.
They give ‘daps’ and part ways. This is the conversation you have no idea that took place, whiles you went to bed all moist thinking you’re about to get yourself a new “good” man. So you tell him yes! He feels good, you feel good, it’s all good right?
Fastforward to the party. he introduces you to the alleged “best friend” who isn’t really his best friend, but the friend that’s always down for the low down and a few of his boys, a cousin or two because it’s all family there! You’re on cloud nine, your with your new man and he’s introducing you by your name followed by this is “the one” I told y’all about.
So he’s been talking about you, definitely he’s been thinking about what you said and he’s feeling it. Oh yeah he deserves to get the goodies, you want to make it physically official! He’s just so sexy right now to you because all of your guards have been dropped, and he’s gained enough trust from you to drop them panties and show him what your working with. You already know his goods are “workable” for you cause y’all been messing around “safely” without crossing the lines before you were ready, he’s so respectful! This is the conversation going on between the vixen in you and the tiny little bit of doubt trying to reason with you about not getting taken in so quickly.
He’s across the room talking to his friend but steadily holding your gaze making sure you don’t feel as though he’s abandoned you whiles his boy is singing the praises to him for being the player of the year for reeking you in.
Fast forward to the end of the night. so he’s driving you home and he’s making good conversation telling you how his friends and fam gave him the approval of you and he’s indicating that he’s excited that you and his friends and fam get along, because you’re the first woman that they actually liked( ok yup, he’s a keeper) this is definitely worth giving a shot! You’ve made history in the books of Mr. potential, you have to give this a try and see where it goes.. Just like he said. (Please bear in mind he didn’t confirm that he was going to bring you anywhere it was an implication planted that you grew and watered all by yourself. )
Last night was perfect, first night meeting his best friend and some members of his family, you got the stamp of approval, the sex was worth the wait, he knows how to put it down in the bedroom, not to mention his cunnilingus skills is literally a brain screwing! He made you breakfast before he dropped you home! This man is perfect! You sit and reflect on the last seven and a half weeks again with that silly Mr Kool aid grin on your face. Not even stopping to pause the breaks to realize that the last text he sent you was after he dropped you home and after all the pleasantries of “glad you enjoyed yourself blah blah blah,” he said “thanks for last night, it was good whiles it lasted”(please note that he just told you, you’re a great person, I’m really not, I had fun, see you around”) but you missed that though, being all Jessica Simpson and her infamous “chicken of the sea” comment!
Silly rabbit smh, you just got tricked!
The next day there’s no good morning text and only a “hey sorry I missed your call, my day has been hectic” text after you called him at least three times to check up on him! You can only imagine what will follow. the lines of communication get smaller and smaller until you get no reply text or you get an automated message notifying you that “the caller is either out of rage or has turned off their phone” now you’re left with a plethora of unwanted hurt emotions and an anger that not even a hurricane would want to compete with, all because you ignored the warning signals and wasn’t paying attention behind that big dumb Mr Kool-aid grin.